Day...48

I am having keeping up on how many days we have been here, much less what day and date it is!!! Grand is sleeping and I am enjoying hearing him snore:)
This week has been wonderful, yet crazy....I would say the boys had a great week, and I have to say I am so thankful the Lindsley's were here to help out!! Courtesy of Steve Fogle, and the Lindsley's, they got to go to the Zoo, River Walk, Sea World, and Two Spurs games...vs. Lakers on Wed. and Cavs on Fri....we went as a family Friday night, and I have to say that was exciting!!! Minus the fact that my camera died and I didn't get but a couple of pics on my cell phone that didn't turn out that great:( BUT, that memory is sketched in my brain...wish I could share that with you....Grand was exhausted, but REALLY enjoyed his time!! We stayed in a private room to watch the game while the boys were almost court side in private seating....Grand can't be around a lot of noise so that worked out perfect...but you can't beat the experience of just being there!!

The first night home took adjusting to, he didn't sleep at all, and then we had to get up Friday and GO, GO, GO....I thought it was a bit much for his first day out, but we will get the hang of it....life is going to go full speed starting Monday. Thankfully we are right next door to his rehab center...CFI....Center For the Intrepid...His occupational therapist Jim will work with him everyday on daily living- driving, how to get around, adjust to life without legs..etc. and his PT will get him in shape and ready for prosthetics...CFI takes the guys on outings like fishing, movies, skiing..YES skiing:) and surfing...and a lot more. This place is amazing...you should google it and see what is all about!! Grand is ready to get the healing process started!!

Day by day this man continues to amaze me.....I know on caring bridge it was shared about his testimony the other day...but all I can say is that I wish I had the faith this man has!!! When he asked me to sing, "It is Well" and he sang with me...jaws shut, tears filling up his eyes, and singing with all his heart, that was a moment with him I will never forget! After we were finished singing, that is when he said, " At first, I thought, we should just go blow the people who did this to me up, but then I felt that was wrong...because God could have done that to us...but he sent Jesus, he came and did everything he could for us, and we tortured and killed him, we stuck a sword in his side, and a crown of thorns on his head, and he suffocated and died for us....if I had to do this all over again, I would, if it meant I could save one person...if I could help one person come to know God!".......
Thank you Father, for this precious man!!!

Day 46

The last blog was a test...to see if it would work!!!
I want to write and tell you about the past week and a half....I have to say my birthday was wonderful last Tuesday, and I was OVERWHELMED with gifts, cards, and sweet messages!! Memorial Drive, you OVER did it..(Marcy:) A group of sweet girls (I don't even know, but one of them) showed up and gave me a birthday party...!!! Then the Kendall's came to celebrate that evening, and brought us ZIO'S..yum!! Thank you everyone for making my birthday so wonderful..the best gift was Grand being alive and better!!!

Thursday was Grands surgery....that was rough!! It was a set back for sure, and the days and nights were long, with no sleep, food, discomfort, and pain! A side of us came out that we had not yet seen...it was a side that I know neither one of us wanted to feel, but I knew at some point, Satan would really try to bring us down....I realized, the lack of both of us not having sleep, the maximum anesthesia for Grand, no food, and pain can cause some crankiness....no food alone for Grand can do that:)....no sleep for ME, will definitely do that! I am sure you could hear the desperation in my voice when I asked for prayers!!!

The boys arrived Friday around 2, and it was a WONDERFUL reunion for us...Grand was in no shape to be excited...he was the whole week leading up to their visit, but the surgery kind of put that on hold!! Last night was the first night he started coming around, and by this morning when I walked in, he was back to his old self!!! I couldn't do anything but Thank GOD throughout the day for being able to see him, drinking his "food", cracking jokes, seeing him thank GOD over and over for blessing him, and loving on those boys!!!
Noah and Nathan were VERY excited to see him happy!!

We have been overwhelmed and blessed with many visitors the past couple of weeks!!! This past weekend our friends, Deb, Jonah, Eli, Laura, Russell, The Lindsley's, and Jacy J, visited...The Lindsley's, Jacy and Raymond's are actually here this week, and it has been great!!
Hopefully we will be out by Thursday:))) and we would love more visitors! Although life has been really busy each day..it is always nice to see "friendly" faces!!


Your prayers help get us through day by day....through the good and the bad....God is ALWAYS good, and I am so thankful you all get to share in this journey with us!! I couldn't do this daily without God, and I couldn't do this daily without my family and brothers and sisters in Christ!! THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH!!!

Day?

Okay, I have blogged twice and both times it failed...so I gave up for a while...plus I have had some REALLY busy days, especially with the boys here...it is easier for me to update my facebook when I am waiting on Grand while he is having test done, of busy doing PT....So much to share...so little time!!

Day 36

Okay...I am WAY behind on updating, but there has been no time at all!! Grand is doing so much better that they wanted to release him TODAY!!! My reaction was not good when I heard the news because we had just gotten back from a little road trip in his power chair over to where we both would be living for a while. We are now staying at the Fisher House...it is almost in the same parking lot as the hospital...by the time we got here in the power chair, he had to rest because he was so exhausted and overheated...it is almost in the 80's everyday...we had to take a shuttle back to the hospital because he couldn't make it...One of the reasons he does not have a lot of energy is because he is not eating a lot...he is not eating a lot because his jaw is still not straight, and he has broken teeth, and a missing tooth....which makes it really hard to eat. He gets smoothies, shakes, etc. a lot, but even that has to be forced......BUT, this past weekend was filled with MANY:) special visitors....The Clark's...who brought in one night, Mexican, Chinese, Italian, and tons of sweets...the Davies, who brought poppy seed chicken, and sides...and the Leaches who brought, tortellini, chicken and rice, and brownies...and the Grissoms who brought Starbucks.....
Let me tell you...that boy ATE!!! Maybe it is the hospital food that's making him not want to eat :))
The Clark's who drove down from the Dallas area, and Chris who is home from Afghanistan ( for R&R) spent the weekend as a family here....Clark 1, as Grand calls him, helped save Grands life...I am BEYOND grateful for him. He came and shared what happened that day with Grand and I am so thankful he could!!
Joyce, Grands former boss from ODC drove 13 hours on Sat. to spend a total of 3-4 hours with him, then turned around and drove back home on Sunday...Grand felt honored that she would do that!!
We had an eventful weekend, which made it go by really fast...as we started today, the Doctors kept saying..he is ready to go "anytime"......then they took Grand for an ENT, and it showed that his jaw really is not lining up and they need to put a plate in. They also may wire his mouth shut again. So the Doctors said he could stay until Friday, the day after the surgery, and since they will not discharge anyone on Friday, we have to wait til Monday....sometimes things don't go as "WE" plan, but I am thankful he will have this time to recuperate some more!!!
I have to tell you..with all that has happened, NEVER once, have I heard Grand complain....NEVER once has he been angry, and NEVER once have I heard him do anything but thank GOD he is alive...everyday I hear him say it. As strong as everyone is saying I am....that man inspires me and it honors me to be strong for him...but HE is the one who is strong!! Abba has great plans for his child....I am blessed to see Gods great work EVERYDAY!!
My Mother in-law is leaving tomorrow, so it will just be me and Grand...he loves having his Mama here and she has been so helpful, but as he is getting ready to leave the hospital, they will only allow one family member to stay. This is where reality hits and the adventure begins!! Can I just tell you...I CAN'T BELIEVE HE HAS ONLY BEEN HERE 36 DAYS, AND HE IS GETTING OUT!!!!! I can believe it, because I witnessed the healing everyday....but sometimes I think how sad it is for it to take a tragedy to see that God does miracles EVERYDAY, not just in cases like this, but in everyday life...we just don't open our eyes to see clearly!! This has really opened my eyes, not just to Gods great love for us, but the fact that he has a plan for us...not always OUR plan..but a plan...his ways are not our ways...right?!!!

Day 31

Today was a good day...mellow towards the end, but the beginning of the day is always crazy!! I get to the hospital now around 7:45 am so I can order Grands breakfast...he is feeding himself, and opening up his drinks...each day his strength grows more and more, but his right side is really weak from the impact he had. He is right handed so he is using his left side more, but he will regain his strength back on that side. Speech comes in, , four different docs come in, PT comes in....Grand does not have a moments peace for the beginning of the day...but he handles it really well!! When PT came today, they put him in his chair and let him roll around...then they asked him if he was finished after SEVERAL laps around the halls, and he wanted to keep going until it wore him out!
His Occupational Therapist said that a lot of guys in this situation get really angry, and I can see how easily they would because you can't just get up and go and live your normal life right away.... but he loved Grands attitude and said that he can't wait to work with him, and asked if he could put Grand on his prayer chain at his Church!!! LOVE IT!!!

His Doctors even think that Grand will be a great Mentor to others like himself....and I have to agree!! He is a living example of letting Gods light shine in him!!

Now I am packing up my hotel room to get ready for my move to the Fisher House.....it is like the Ronald McDonald house....we can stay there for a longer period of time...it will be an adjustment and a blessing to be living close to others who are going through the same things we are!! I am thinking by the time the boys get here next Friday, Grand will be out of the hospital.....still....so in awe over that!!
I am not great at asking for prayers, especially when I know most of you are praying already.....but please pray that this transition goes well...this is a big move coming up, and I know that God has already provided me with so much strength.....but I need that strength to continue on! I know life is going to change drastically again...and I want to be strong when having the privilege of taking care of my husband, and the wisdom to always do what is best for him!! Also please pray that I get some rest...I am so restless at night when I am not up there with him, and that will change soon, but until then...I need sleep, just ask the nurses:)
Thank you all so much, again...the cards, messages and special treats keep flooding in, and we are so blessed that you love us to think of us STILL!!!

Day 29 and 30

Well as most of you read on Caring Bridge...they finally moved Grand out of the ICU!!! It was kind of like moving your child from Preschool to the 5th grade automatically, because the next step after this floor, is to move him over to live with me where I am staying.
That sounds SO unbelievable!!!! They told us yesterday it would be 2-3 weeks and he is out, then today, they told us it would be sometime next week!!!
Now this doesn't mean they are done with us, it just means, I will be his caregiver and we will stay together right across the street from the hospital and make a daily visit there for care. This hospital also has one of the top Intrepid centers in the world for prosthetics, therapy, and more!!!
I am not going to lie when I tell you....I thought we were going to be here for A LONG time!!! Never in my wildest dreams would I believe if they told me when he got here that we would be out of inpatient care within two months! I don't even think the nurses and Doctors could have told you that!! Two Docs left his room yesterday walking down the hall and I could hear them saying, "AMAZING".....
We found out yesterday, Grand has permanent hearing loss in his left ear....he also has some vision problems, but I am sure they can fix that....
Today he got in his manual wheelchair and rode himself on down to the front of the hospital.....he is progressing so well! We also put some real clothes on him and went to visit his nurses in the ICU and they came in to check on him as well, we miss the ICU Nurses really bad, but we are so happy he is making progress!
All in all, I am thankful and constantly in awe of what GOD, Grand, the Medical team, and what your prayers have accomplished in such a short amount of time....before you know it, we will be home, and Grand will be walking again!!! I cannot wait for that day!!

Day 27-28

Well, we didn't go down hill, we moved a little up, and stayed the same these past two days!! We had an amazing nurse named Heidi...she was encouraging, prayed for Grand, and even read him scripture today....he loved that:)
He has been really tired because his blood count is low, but he is eating more!! We kind of have to force him to eat most times, but that is just because he is so tired!! One thing he is doing a lot more of is TALKING:))
They are ready to move Grand to a step down unit, which is so bittersweet...I have bonded with most of the nurses, and one nurse told me today, we are like family to them, because no one ever gets to stay in ICU that long!! I am really going to miss them, but rejoice in the fact we are progressing. Again I will tell you that so many people call it a miracle that he is recovering so fast, I cannot even believe how fast he has recovered myself!!
So I ask...please do not quit praying for him...right now there are still head trauma issues (memory), Phantom pain, the loss of his friends....he even asked if the Afghanies he knew there were okay....and the sadness I believe he is experiencing....I do have to say though...that this list is small compared to what it was in the beginning, and I am SO, SO grateful for that!!

One last thing....this is hard on a lot of people, and my life gets so wrapped up in day to day caring for Grand, but I am noticing every day that it gets harder and harder for Noah and Nathan!! If you know them, they may not show it to well, but I hear it in their sweet voices each day.......I am so blessed and thankful for my Mom who left EVERYTHING in one day and came to stay with those boys so they could have the comfort of their own home...what would I do without her...Those boys are in good hands, but they are really hurting, and I am missing them more and more each day!! Please continue to pray for them, and that they can hold on for just a few more months until we can be together again!!!

Day 26

Was it really just last night I was asking you to pray for specific things, and then today there they were answered??:))) IT WAS!!!:))
I walked in this morning and Grand was resting peacefully....eyes opened as he greeted me, "Hi Sweetness";)......that is what he calls me all the time, I could tell we were off to a good start!!
He was having some phantom pain and asked me to rub his feet for him:( I told him there were no feet there and he kind of looked at me like...oh yeah...and then we moved on!
One of his female commanding officers came in to check on him which she does often, and she was just beaming at how well he was...she said, "Praise Jesus.." and then he said, "Yes, I thank God I am alive...and then he went into this AMAZING testimony that brought all of us in there pure joy to hear of his love for the one that saved him...I wish I could remember every word, I wish I recorded it for you all to hear...I have never heard of such testimony in my life!!!!!

That was just the wonderful beginning of the day.....
Physical therapy called the day before and ordered a manual wheel chair for Grand..when the company brought it in today, I looked at it and said, "NO WAY...he is not ready for this, and it has no headrest for his head which he needs for his head injury....the guy who built it agreed, and so did his nurse.....one of the other nurses said to just keep it and see if it would work out...in the meantime PT was called and they came up....
Well guess what.....not only did they put Grand in the chair, he held his head up the whole time...(which he does need a helmet since part of his skull is missing) AND....he drove himself up and down the halls on his own....his PT was holding his IV pole and could hardly keep up with him!!!
I admitted I doubted and gave his PT an apology, and thanks!!!
That not only left me in tears, but it left me in total AWE of what God is doing...I was already in awe, but I don't think a lot of people would have believed it if they didn't see it themselves!!! I did take a picture, but I will wait until he can really approve it to show!!!

He also ate today...he filled his quota!

THE VERY BEST PART OF THE DAY, if that wasn't enough......
We talked for a long time:))) real conversation.....we even laughed some, and he smiled a lot throughout the day!!!! I really got to talk with my best friend, and I shared with him all the amazing support he has out there, and he just cannot believe it...as if the cards alone didn' t prove it:)) it was good....it was all so good!!! The only real sad part of the day was him telling me that one of the nurses told him that the other two he was with did not make it...he asked me who was with him, and I told him. He looked at me and said, "I talked to (I won't say his name to protect his privacy) about God all the time!! It was sad for Grand to realize more loss on his part, but remembering and stating the fact that God was in this guys heart before he passed, I believe gave Grand some peace!!!!
I said it would get better or be the same.....it got better...and I am not saying tomorrow will be the same as today....but we had today, and that was good enough for me:))))

Day 25

Today was not as eventful as yesterday, but day by day there is progress.
I am sad to report that for now his brain injury is causing him to forget things, and today "again," he discovered he didn't have any legs.
He does remember our names, the boys, family, and many other things...but missing his legs was a whole new thing today and it was not easy for him. His frontal lobe was severely damaged but it is amazing to me how well he was doing considering that fact!!
Physical therapy is going great, he is lifting up with his arms, and pushing hard as ever to do what is asked of him. He has obviously lost a lot of weight so we are encouraging him to eat more because if he doesn't they will put the feeding or a G tube in....and right now he is NOT eating a lot!
Tomorrow is a whole new day and it may be better or the same...but I have faith we won't take a step back....Please, please continue to pray, and specifically for the eating part, and that his brain injury will heal and he will be able to cope with what is, and continue being the person he was so wonderfully made to be!!!

Day 24

WHOOOOHOO to day 24....
:))
When I arrived early this morning, I walked in the room and Grand was sitting up (with assistance from the bed of course:) and had his eyes wide open, and NO FEEDING TUBE!!! Anne, my favorite night nurse told me that he had pulled it out at around 3 that morning, and that was that...she fed him applesauce, and he gulped down a cup of water or 2...he was talking clearly, and giving orders:)) He has been asking for soda everyday for the past week so finally Holly went and got him one of her Dr. Peppers out and he drank half of that...and then took a few bites of pureed turkey:( mashed potatoes, and pureed green beans:(.....he is off to a good start regarding food....the trachea came out too!!!!!
As the day went by, Grand told me and Major Sturm (his day nurse, and friend:) that he was having Phantom leg syndrome....we looked at each other like, "how does he know he has this".....Grand was really listening in his sleep!!! We have to ask him everyday where he is, who we are, etc. because of the brain injury...but we asked him again today if he remembered what happened, and he said, "I got shot or something.." We told him some of what happened and then he asked who was with him...we told him we would talk about that later and he was okay with that! I told him God loves him and saved him for a reason and he said, "I know!!"
He really came alive today and everyone that came in to see him from Doctors, nurses, therapist...EVERYONE was amazed by what they saw....
That Phantom pain really is bothering him right now so please keep that in your prayers....your prayers are carrying us right to the Throne Room, and I thank you with all my heart that you love him that much to pray day and night.....God is good...ALL the time!!!

Day 23...

It has been one month to the day this all happened!! One month...I keep saying in my head because it seems so unreal to me! I feel like this month has flown by at the same time gone so slow...slow because I feel like I haven't seen my boys in forever, but fast because Grand is healing day by day in ways I would say are miraculous!
This experience has left me speechless in so many ways, the outpouring of love, and faith, the renewed, restored relationships, people REALLY talking to our Father....it moves me everyday, but yet there is this heartbreak and sadness I feel when I hear my husband say that he just wants to get up and walk by himself....it is not my legs that are missing, but I feel in some way they are. When he hurts, I hurt, when he cries, I cry, I am feeling his pain for him but it won't ever be the same as what he is feeling.
I know when they slow up on his drugs, it will be different...I cannot stand to be there when Physical therapy comes in to work with him because I know he is still in a lot of pain...he still has the feeding tube, picc lines, monitors, trachea and more hooked up..but when PT comes in, they work him, and he does it, and DOES NOT COMPLAIN, and DOES NOT GIVE UP...I love and admire his strength...some would just give up, but I think Grand knows he has a reason to live....I look up to him and love him more (which I didn't think was possible) than I EVER have before, and I know that one day that man will walk, run, box, do everything he loves to do!!!!